Living with State Alchemists
by Kaoru.and.Hikaru
Summary: Siam Sim has returned, and it's up to our favorite characters and their girlfriends to save the day again.


Living with State Alchemists

"**Second Lt. Amanda Williams, at your service!" I exclaimed, saluting Colonel Mustang as I entered his office. 1****st**** Lt. Hawkeye and 2****nd**** Lt. Havoc were all sitting on a couch in his office, bored. Ed (a lowly officer) was being nagged on at the moment. Mustang's girlfriend Avalon and Ed's girlfriend Kristen were arguing over who was better. Me, I was there to see my boyfriend Havoc, a smart mouthed, blond guy. The weird thing here is half of this military is made of alchemists, people who can change one thing into something else by following equivalent exchange. The two in this room would be Mustang, the flame alchemist (can make flames at will by snapping), and Ed the Fullmetal alchemist (can make weapons and such by metal, also his left and right arm are made of metal). Hawkeye is a sharpshooter (great gun handling) and the rest are followers of Mustang. Me, I like using swords, big swords. Avalon, a second Lt. is the ice alchemist, and Kristen, the plant alchemist. **

"**Hmm, oh yes, I called you all here today for a special assignment," Mustang said as I sat next to Havoc, who then put his arm around me," Remember Siam-Sid, well someone decided to rebuild it all."**

"**Did Gramps do it?" Ed asked (he means this old guy named Arlen who is possessed with studying it).**

"**No, that old coot didn't do it," Mustang said.**

"**It must have been another alchemist, who else would want it fixed for its spire?" I asked.**

"**We know no one can get into the spire because it collapsed, the Crimson Elixir isn't there anymore," Hawkeye said.**

"**Crimson Elixir, what's that?" I asked.**

"**Oops, we weren't supposed to tell her that, huh, might as well tell her now," Hawkeye said with a slight smile.**

"**Well, it happened just a little while ago, about a year or two… you know what, Ed you tell her," Mustang said smiling. **

"**WHAT! Why do I have to?"**

"**Because I said so."**

"**I might as well tell her," Avalon said losing her patience," the crimson stone is an item that can restore, make, or fix anything. I'm not exactly sure why the military wants it yet."**

"**Well anyway," Kristen continued," Ed and Al are looking for it to restore their bodies back to the way they were a long time ago. The one in Siam-Sid broke after we found it and had to destroy it in order to stop a guy that was going all out to bring back his dead lover. You remember Ed?"**

"**Yeah, well we have to find what's causing Siam-Sid to be back to normal, must be alchemy."**

"**Brother, are you sure we should go back?" Al asked.**

"**Why not, hey, this time we won't need Armstrong. We'll only need Hawkeye, Amanda, Avalon, Kristen, and if we must Ed, Al, and of course myself," Mustang said.**

"**No trouble," Avalon, Kristen, and I said together, me with my unbreakable sword over my back, Avalon with an ice rapier (practically unbreakable, and doesn't melt), and Kristen with a rose whip.**

**So we left in a military car, too bad we had to leave Havoc behind. The seven of us fit easily. Mustang got to drive, with Avalon next to him. **

**Then in the second row of seats, it was Hawkeye, and Kristen, and I. Ed and Al were cramped in the back. Poor Kristen, with her boyfriend in the back, she kept talking to him to calm him down, but Mustang kept making it worse by doing something to make him mad, that is until Avalon hit him and told him to stop.**

"**Ow, Avalon, what did you hit me for?"**

"**Because you're a vilgehc moron."(Just guess what it means).**

"**What the heck is that supposed to mean!"**

**Now it was Ed's turn to make him mad.**

"**You should know, Mustang, I mean you are super smart," Ed said sarcastically," right Al?"**

"**Umm, yeah, you're right brother."**

"**Yeah, of course, it's so obvious!" Kristen said stifling a laugh.**

"**Hawkeye, please tell me you don't know what it means either?" Mustang begged.**

"**Of course I do, you should to, you know, I think the only other person who wouldn't know, would be your friend."**

"**Which one?"**

"**Do I have to say it, Lt. Col. Hughes!" Hawkeye finished shaking her head.**

**The road trip continued like that. When we finally got there, Mustang was quiet, and Ed stopped complaining. We noticed that all of Siam-Sid was deserted, and the spire in the middle of the city was well, different. You didn't need alchemy to get in anymore, it looked just like a normal building.**

"**That's weird, the whole city's deserted, but everything looks fine, no blood stains or anything. Well I guess the only thing to do is to go to the spire and fix things," Ed said looking around.**

"**Thanks for pointing out the obvious genius," Mustang said as he patted Ed on the head.**

"**You know, you really piss me off!" Ed shouted.**

"**Watch it Fullmetal." **

"**Make me Flamie."**

"**WHAT DID YOU CALL ME?"**

"**Flamie, what, don't like it, ok how about gaseous, no?"**

"**I'm going to kill you!"**

"**No you won't!" Avalon shouted, grabbing his arm.**

"**Why not! He deserves it!"**

"**Yeah, and think about who else you will hurt with one of your big explosions. You'll hurt all of us, maybe even yourself. Useless."**

"**U…u…useless?" Then he sulked again.**

"**Just kidding!"**

"**Can we please just get this over with!" Kristen yelled, cracking her whip.**

"**Yeah, too bad Havoc isn't here," I moaned.**

"**He's useless," Mustang said slyly. **

"**WHAT DID YOU CALL HIM!" I yelled.**

"**Useless."**

**The rest had to hold me back from killing him. I was really gonna kill him because he was insulting my boyfriend. He is not useless. They even had to take away my sword until I calmed down.**

"**Sorry," he muttered (after Avalon kicked him),"didn't know it'd make you so mad."**

"**It's okay, he is a pretty big, yet funny, idiot," I said apologetically, after I kicked him of course.**

"**Why is everyone kicking me?"**

"**Because you are able to get you're girlfriend and everyone else mad. Me on the other hand try not to. That's why I have a very nice girlfriend, uh, no offense Avalon."**

"**None taken, at least he APOLOGIZES for saying something wrong. Hey Mustang, you should try to learn from him."**

"**Learn from him my ass."**

"**You mean your tight ass," Ed laughed.**

"**Hmph, lets go, hey Ed, if you're so smart, then why don't you lead the way to the spire," Mustang said sarcastically.**

"**Ok, umm, let's see, gosh, it was a lot easier when the Golems were around, you could actually tell you were going the right way. Aha, here we are, see, I did know which way we were going."**

**This spire looked as it did after Ed made a path to it. We walked in ready to fight of course.**

"**Jeez, this place is really spooky," I moaned, thinking of Havoc.**

"**It was a lot spookier before, that's odd, there's no one here, we'll just have to get to the room where we found the stone in the first place," Ed said leading the way.**

**In the Room of the Crimson Stone**

**Fourth Descent**

"**Jeez this place is really creepy, huh," Envy mimicked me, transforming (Envy can transform into anything he sees).**

"**Envy, must you do that to everyone, it gets tiresome after awhile," Lust commented (Lust has extending fingernails that can cut through anything),"why don't you mimic someone funnier, Ed for instance."**

"**That puny thing, rather not," Envy snorted.**

"**Can I eat him?" Gluttony asked (he eats anything).**

"**Not yet."**

"**I'm back, along with Wrath. Greed and Pride decided not to come," Sloth said quietly (she can turn herself into water).**

"**Oh well, Greed didn't have our same views anyway. Since people keep fighting and dying, the crimson stone is growing. Stupid humans," Lust laughed.**

**Back in the Spire**

"**Hey, check this out, there's only one path of stairs, instead of their being three different paths. At least this will become a lot easier."**

**Last time they split into three different groups and had to meet up a lot later, well after the others caught up to Ed and Al anyway.**

"**Let's go."**

**So we continued up the steps.**

"**I wonder why we came in such a big group anyway. We probably didn't need the girls," Mustang said without thinking.**

"**Excuse me," Hawkeye said raising her gun," would you care to repeat that. Man, Ed ****is**** better at talking to people."**

**Mustang's phone rang.**

"**Oh no, not now. It's Hughes," Mustang groaned (Hughes is not dead, Envy almost killed him)," Hello, not now, no I don't need to know about your daughter. I'm kind of busy right now. Fine, if you must call back, do it a lot later. Hey, Hughes, can you send flame through a phone? Yeah, you're bugging me, bye. Man he bugs me," Mustang yelled, Avalon trying to soothe him.**

"**Then why did you answer? You don't have to answer," Avalon said quietly.**

"**Next time he calls, I'm not answering, let's continue on," Mustang ordered the rest of the group.**

"**Oh great a maze, whatever shall we do. Heh, I've got a perfect idea," Ed said laughing.**

**Ed then clapped his hands and placed them on the ground. The surrounding area turned into a simple tunnel, a long tunnel with funny carvings of Mustang and Ed's battle, yet on one side, Ed was winning, and the other, Mustang.**

**After much boasting and fistfights and of course some kicking of guys by Avalon and Kristen, they finally got to the door of the fourth descent.**

"**I have a feeling this is going to be very important, everyone ready?" Mustang asked going for the handle.**

"**Yep!" I said looking around as everyone brought out his or her weapons.**

**Mustang opened the door and saw nothing. Well he couldn't see anything because the room was pitch black. So in order to show off, he shot three or four sparks out and then saw the real thing.**

"**Aww man, not them, not now," Ed moaned.**

"**Time to fight then! Who wants to see who will defeat more homunculi?" Mustang dared.**

"**Like you'll ever see who wins! This will all be over before it even starts." Envy said, turning into Armstrong.**

"**Oh, I'm going to enjoy this," Ed yelled, pulling a long blade from the ground.**

"**Oh please, like you are ever going to beat us," Lust said quietly.**

"**Oh yeah, and water is going to scare us how?" Ed laughed. **

"**I wouldn't laugh, as you can see there is plenty of water around, so I'd be careful if I were you. Hey, your deaths will contribute to the philosopher's stone, you can't win," Sloth said.**

"**Don't count us out just yet!" Ed yelled, clapping and placing his hands on the ground and then pulling up a sword.**

"**Hey, Fullmetal, let's see who does better, you or me," Mustang challenged.**

"**You're on!"**

"**Guys, this is no time for challenges, this is kind of a serious moment," Hawkeye said, reloading her gun.**

"**There's no need to be mean Hawkeye, you can join in to if that's it," Mustang mocked, laughing afterwards.**

"**Men," Hawkeye sighed, aiming at Envy and firing, just slightly missing.**

"**Let's get this over with. I've got more important things to do later!" I yelled, heading straight for Envy (posed as Armstrong), and clashing with him, both of us being knocked a few feet away from each other, me on my butt.**

"**Told ya it'd be over before it starts," Envy laughed, now changing to a soldier with a sword.**

**Then, boom a gunshot went off. I looked at Hawkeye, who was too busy along with Avalon and Mustang, against Sloth and Gluttony to have done it.**

**I then looked the other way and my heart jumped, Havoc was there, holding a gun that had just fired.**

"**Havoc!" I yelled," Get me out of here."**

"**Hey Chief, how's it going? I see you're in trouble, so I'll get you right out of there, ok?"**

"**Damn, that hurt, I'm gonna kill you!" Envy yelled, pissed off.**

"**Well time to work," Havoc said, firing the gun.**

"**Too slow!" Envy yelled, tripping him onto the floor, pushing his gun away. He then turned into an officer with a bigger sword.**

**Next thing you know, I've got my huge blade to his neck.**

"**One more move towards him, and you will have a bloody stub as a head. So move back and I will fight you instead," I told him with pure hatred in my voice.**

"**But, Chief," Havoc started.**

"**No worries, I've never lost before and I sure as hell don't plan to now. Just watch."**

"**Careful," Havoc muttered.**

**Before we fought, I took a quick glance around to make sure everyone was okay. Kristen, Ed, and Al were having some issues while fighting Wrath, but weren't hurt yet. Mustang, Avalon, and Hawkeye were fighting off the other sins, and were not having too many issues as well.**

"**Hmph, I can't die now, I've got too much to do, not to mention a boyfriend that I'm taking out to dinner next weekend," I told Envy with a huge smile on my face.**

"**What, you mean that sad sap of a boyfriend, that's too weak to defend his own girlfriend, that's pretty sad. Oh well, I don't know why you bother with him, you should get a better boyfriend!" Envy teased.**

"**What do you mean by that! He's a lot better than you think," I yelled lunging at him," he's even given up smoking for me so I would stay with him, you don't know how hard it is to find a boyfriend who truly loves you. So don't talk smack about my boyfriend!"**

**I ran and leaped over his head, slicing off an arm as I went over.**

"**Ouch, that hurt, whoa, where are you, dang you're moving fast," Envy said as I dodged around him, and kept cutting him up as I went. Soon, he was all cut up and bloody, too much to have been able to change to normal without issues. However, he was able to change back, and as I was about to get another hit, he escaped.**

"**Woo, that was hard," I sighed as I collapsed onto the floor, Havoc rushing to my side.**

"**Hey, are you okay, maybe you should rest for a while. Oh, thanks for saving my life, well, at least I didn't lose you," Havoc said as he put his arm around me, trying to comfort and help bandage and take care of my wounds.**

"**I just hope everyone else will be okay. Man I got myself into more than I bargained for. Well, that's what I get for being a talented blade master," I said, as I smiled at Havoc, and he smiled back.**

**As soon as I finished saying anything, the rest of the homunculi ran off, beat up from he fight. For some reason, everyone else was fine, barely a scratch on them.**

"**Hey no fair, how is it that I'm the only one who gets really beat up. Man that is so wrong!" I yelled, getting really mad.**

"**Well, at least your alive," Avalon said, bending down and smiling.**

"**Yeah, it was a lot harder than we expected it to be'" Kristen said, thinking.**

"**I knew it was going to be that hard all along! Ouch!" Mustang yelled as Avalon kicked him," What was that for?"**

"**For being an idiot."**

"**Can we please just go home?" I moaned as Havoc helped me up.**

"**Yeah, aww man, the building's collapsing again! Let's get out of here!" Ed yelled, running for his life, everyone behind him.**

**We finally reached a huge sand dune beyond the city, and looked back just as the city crumbled, back to ruins as it was before.**

"**Man, how do I miss everything?" A man said from behind them.**

"**? Oh Gramps, how are you doing?" Ed asked.**

"**Fine kid, the names Arlen, not Gramps."**

"**How'd you know about it?"**

"**People at the archaeology center informed me that Siam-Sid was mysteriously rebuilt, so I came to check it out, but I see I missed it, oh well, I'm going home," Arlen said as he walked away.**

"**Maybe we should get going too, oh well, at least this trip wasn't for nothing," Mustang said as he walked off, Avalon right next to him, smiling.**

"**That was so boring, oh well, oh Mustang, you want to fight, or are you so scared you're going to pee your pants, because you know that I'm going to win!" Ed mocked, sending Mustang into a rage.**

"**What did you say Fullmetal, I'm going to kick you're…"**

**Wham**

"**Ouch, dang Avalon, what's with you and just loving to kick me?"**

"**You got what you deserve."**

"**She's right, sir, you did deserve it, there's no need to kill Edward,' Hawkeye said walking by him.**

**Havoc and I laughed as we walked to the car that Havoc brought along, while the rest went to the other.**

"**We still going for our date tomorrow night?" Havoc asked as he started the car.**

"**I would fight for it any day, let's get out of this hot desert." **

**Then we all drove back to Central.**

**Back at Headquarters:**

"**But I still can't figure out how the homunculi were able to create Siam-Sid without the stone," Kristen whined.**

"**Don't know, don't care," Avalon said, laying her head down in her arms.**

"**Well, I'm going to go out with Havoc tonight, so I don't have a care in the world!"**

**The other two stared at me as I walked out the door, slamming it behind me.**

"**Man, she's happy," Kristen whispered.**

"**Yeah, well, I wish Mustang did that for me," Avalon groaned.**

**I then smiled as I walked off and met up with Havoc for dinner.**

_**The End**_

8


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